Life & Living, Love, Poetry

i’ll be glad when christmas is over

Christmas isn’t all it’s cracked up to be for many people who, for whatever reason, find themselves alone or feeling alone. This poem is about the grief, sadness, and despair that many, including myself, may experience. If you feel like this, you may find some comfort in knowing you are not alone at this time of year or any other time of year for that matter. Difficulties are part and parcel of the human condition.

In the end, all things pass. And there’s hope in that.

P.S. I’d never heard The White Cliffs of Dover until I sang it with Mom after she moved out of the big red brick house on the hill. I thought it the perfect finish for this poem.

i’ll be glad when christmas is over

by punkie 2017

when christmas is over
i won’t have to pretend
to feel jolly and bright
when I’m empty within

i’ve no brothers or sisters
my family’s all gone
there’s nothing but darkness
where once the sun shone

what’s that you say?
be of good cheer?
how can I? who would?
i cry through my tears

my friends all have children
or parents or cousins
get-togethers to go to
sometimes by the dozen

but i’m not invited
to join in their parties
with ribbons and wrapping
and stuff hale and hearty

i wish i were happy
with all that I have
instead i feel lonely
forgotten and sad

but don’t get me wrong
please don’t be mistaken
your pity’s unneeded
as i’m not forsaken

no I’m not alone
oh no not at all!
there are millions more like me
someone’s neglected to call

those who give care
with little support
“we don’t have the time!”
their families retort

old folks in bad places
that none go to see
seems they’ve become
unwanted debris

homeless on streets
in boxes and sheds
without any blankets
or even a bed

people flee their own countries
escape in small boats
then drown by the thousands
because they don’t float

the seasonal spirit
to some is a bottle
or the comfort that’s found
in the folds of a brothel

like everything else
this too shall pass
just as happiness ends
the sadness won’t last

so don’t worry, don’t fret
it’s just the holiday blues
all will be fixed
in the year that is new

our hopes they ring out
like bells on a sleigh
the path will be found
with a will and a way

things may have changed
by this time next year
though the dearth of much promise
fills my heart with cold fear

perhaps if i write
dear santa a letter
next year he’ll deliver
a world that is better

so yes, I’ll be glad
when christmas is over
as i look forward and back
to the white cliffs of dover

 

©2017 Susan Macaulay. I invite you to share my poetry widely, but please do not reblog or copy and paste my poems into other social media without my permission. Thank you.

https://myalzheimersstory.com/2015/12/23/an-alzheimers-dementia-christmas-story/

https://myalzheimersstory.com/2017/12/06/santa-claus-lives-with-dementia/

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Teepa Snow, Tips, tools & skills

Teepa’s top 10 ten holiday tips plus 10 more from me (and three PDFs!)

Yes, holidays are special times, but they can also be stressful on many people, particularly people who find themselves alone, or people who live with dementia.

Here are 10 simple “visitor do’s” from dementia care pioneer Teepa Snow for those who might not be accustomed to spending time with someone with dementia but who will be visiting during the festive season:

  1. Start with a smile and a handshake
  2. Introduce yourself by name, even if you think the person with dementia knows you well
  3. Use short phrases; pause between thoughts and ideas
  4. Talk about old times
  5. Talk about happy events and memories (say “I remember,” NOT “do you remember?)
  6. Accept general comments, don’t delve too deep
  7. Be prepared for repetition
  8. Do something with the person instead of just talking
  9. Go with the flow of the conversation
  10. Stay calm

Share this link or download Teepa’s tips below, and send them to your holiday visitors BEFORE they arrive for their visit. The PDF includes 10 tips for people with dementia as well as 10 tips for care partners; it’s a great resource. Also, Teepa’s Holiday GEMS will help you better understand how to engage your loved one with dementia wherever they are in the disease process. You can also download the GEMS(TM) PDF at the end of this post.

Besides these great Teepa Snow tips, here are 10 Festive Dementia “Don’ts” from MyAlzheimersStory:

  1. Don’t argue. Ever.
  2. Don’t ask if they remember you
  3. Don’t be disappointed if they don’t recognize you
  4. Don’t ask them if they remember specific people, things or events. Instead, talk about the people, things or events yourself and let them join in
  5. Don’t treat them in ways you wouldn’t want to be treated yourself
  6. Don’t exclude them from activities
  7. Don’t talk about them as if they aren’t there when they’re right there beside you
  8. Don’t pity or patronize them
  9. Don’t forget they are people just like you
  10. Don’t focus on what they can’t do; celebrate the things they can

These tips work anytime; you can use them all year round.

Here are the download gifts from me to you:

Merry Christmas!

https://myalzheimersstory.com/2015/12/23/an-alzheimers-dementia-christmas-story/

https://myalzheimersstory.com/2017/12/06/santa-claus-lives-with-dementia/

https://myalzheimersstory.com/2017/12/29/im-glad-christmas-is-over/

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