Life & Living, Memories, Poetry

Two Mothers Remembered by Joann Snow Duncanson

I love this beautiful poem by Joann Snow Duncanson.

It’s at once tender and loving, sad and joyful, grateful and hopeful.  Mothers and daughters worldwide who live with dementia every day know the truth in these words captured so eloquently in just six stanzas.

Thank you Joann Snow Duncanson, for living the journey with your mother and for sharing it with us in this beautiful piece of poetry. We too are one.


Two Mothers Remembered

by Joann Snow Duncanson

I had two mothers – two mothers I claim,
two different people, yet with the same name.
Two separate women, diverse by design,
but I loved them both because they were mine.

The first was the mother who carried me here,
gave birth and nurtured and launched my career.
She was the one whose features I bear,
complete with the facial expressions I wear.

She gave her love, which follows me yet,
along with examples in life that she set.
As I got older, she somehow younger grew,
and we’d laugh as just mothers and daughters do.

But then came the time that her mind clouded so,
and I sensed that the mother I knew would soon go.
So quickly she changed and turned into the other,
a stranger dressed in the clothes of my mother.

Oh, she looked the same, at least at arms length,
but now she was the child and I was her strength.
We’d come full circle, we women three,
my mother the first, the second and me.

And if my own children should come to a day,
when a new mother comes and the old goes away,
I’d ask of them nothing that I didn’t do.
Love both of your mothers as both have loved you.

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21 thoughts on “Two Mothers Remembered by Joann Snow Duncanson”

  1. I just left my mothers memorial service. I read Two Mothers Remembered. She battled AZ for twenty years. I was her strength all those years. That poem said it all. I was there when she died. When they both died. Thank you for writing it.


    1. Sarah, I’m so sorry for the loss of your mother(s). thank you on her behalf for being her strength. I’m sure you were comforted to be there when she died.

      As far as I know, Joann Snow Duncanson wrote the poem “Two Mothers Remembered.” I’ve tried to track her down online, so far unsuccessfully.

      But I’m pleased to be able to share the poem in honor of mothers and daughters everywhere.


  2. Every child needs both sperm (from father) and ovary (from mother) to be conceived – this is basic Biology 101. To claim that a child has “two moms” is a lie. Every child has both a father and a mother in order to exist….hence, all that same sex parents are doing is ignoring one of the parents and adding a step-parent in place. So the “two moms” family is actually one biological dad (who is being ignored) +1 biological mom and 1 step-mom. Likewise, the “two dads” family is actually one biological mom (who is being ignored) + one biological dad + one step-dad. The idea that there are only “two moms” family or “two dads” family is a lie and if it were true, then no children would exist and so these same sex couples would NEVER be parents. The social engineering of gay culture in our western societies is why the most basic fact of life (ie. that a child needs both a father and a mother to exist) is being ignored and in it’s place is the illusion that same sex parents can be the same as opposite sex parents – no such thing can happen and it is a lie to make out that it can. A lot more could be said about the other requirements that children need to have both the father AND mother inputs into their lives as they are growing up….but same sex parents are denying children such inputs AND denying children a basic human right to have a father and a mother…..WHY?….simply to make homosexuality look normal and acceptable when nothing could be further from the truth.


    1. Dear Neil,

      1) you completely misunderstood and misinterpreted this poem
      2) millions of children are raised by single parents of either sex
      3) millions more children are raised by siblings or themselves because both their parents are not present for whatever reason
      4) aside from the biological reference to sperm and egg being required, I disagree with everything you’ve said
      5) if you troll my blog again, I will delete your comment as spam

      Have a nice day.


  3. My mother came to live with my husband and I when her dementia got where she was unable to live alone any longer. After a year and a half of taking care of her she passed away this past March. Yes, the dementia changed my Mom to someone I didn’t recognize at times, but my love for her never changed. At her memorial service our pastor read this poem. Just about everyone who was there was crying. What a beautiful poem. It describes exactly what it was like taking care of my Mom.


    1. Kerry, I’m sorry for the loss of your mother, and happy that you were able to be with her and she with you until the end. You’re right, this is a beautiful poem, and I consider myself lucky to have spent so much time with my mother during the last five years of her life, even though it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done – It was also joyful and healing and I have no regrets.


  4. I too have just lost my mum on 18/07/2017 . I also read the beautifull poem, 2 mothers remembered at her service. Dememtia is an evil monster and somehow this poem just says it all. It was the hardest 4 years ever going through denial, anger, violence as mum tried to come to terms with what was happening to her. Then the awfull time when she could do nothing herself even talk or eat. I stayed with her throughout and was there for 13 hours until she took her last breath. Horrible, but so glad l was with her to the end as she was with me at the start. xx


    1. My mom passed October 28, 2017 and there is not a day that goes by that i don’t think of her. I wish i could have her back in my arms just once more. We had some wonderful times her and i and i cherish the day she came in my life. I was very fortunate to have a mom like i had and i will never forget her. I took care of my parents all my life and i would not trade or change anything i have done for them. Some days are so so for me and its a struggle to make it to the end of the day but i know one day i will be with her once again and i long for that day to come. I love you mom and i will be waiting till God calls me home to be with you and daddy. Robin xoxo


      1. Oh Robin ❤

        Your comment made me cry. I feel your grief and longing. I hope you discover a way to find some peace between now and when you join your mom and dad ❤


    2. I have just read your post and I cannot believe how true this is. I have just lost my own Mother to this ‘evil monster’. Like yourself, I also read this poem at her service as I couldn’t have described the last few years with my mum any better. I too was with my mum until her last breath as she passed away comfy in her bed. x


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