I strongly believe we stay connected to those we love and those who love us across vast distances of time and space and beyond life and death.
I recall this quote from one of my all-time favourite books: “Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah” by Richard Bach:
“Your friends will know you better in the first minute you meet
than your acquaintances will know you in a thousand years.”
Likewise, I believe we feel connected with the souls we love regardless of whether they seem to remember or recognize us on the superficial level of this life. If you feel disconnected or sad because your care partner with dementia doesn’t recognize you, these 20 questions might help.
Marty McGill lost his mom to Alzheimer’s disease. When I first heard the tune he wrote for her it made me cry because it was so similar to my experience. I left a comment; Marty immediately replied. He wrote:
“The last 6 months or so at home she would get up throughout the night. I slept on a loveseat those months so I could wake when she came down the hall. She would be smiling, dressed the best she could manage, ready to start the day, and I would redirect her back to bed. First thing I did every morning was get her dressed and sit her by the window while I fixed her breakfast. I would put crumbs on the sill to draw the birds in. She would watch them and talk to them. I miss my mom.”
Here is the beautiful song McGill wrote about love beyond recognition and about being a care partner: