they may forget, and we should reach out

4

holding hands paint beauty CU

 

Alzheimer’s dementia care partners everywhere despair as their loved ones’ friends and sometimes even their family members seem to disappear, leaving both the person with dementia and their care partner feeling isolated and alone at a time when they need friends and support more than ever.

I know what it’s like; I’ve been there myself. It’s devastating, debilitating and soul-destroying.

There may not be any pain greater than being helpless in the face of a loved one’s suffering. When requests for help are refused, it compounds the misery.

MaryBeth Beamer captures the agony of her husband Alan Beamer in this gone-viral video:

 

In response, Laura Bowley of Mindset gathered a group of her friends who live with dementia (Jan Ford, Kelly Wood, Teresa Webb, Mary Beth Wighton, Michael Ellenbogen, and Chuck Frichot) to send this message of support and encouragement:

 

 

People living with dementia are still people. They have feelings and needs, like we all do.

They may not remember clearly, they may repeat, they may behave differently than they did before, but they are still there. Their spirits are alive and well.

Don’t run away from people living with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia.

Run toward them. Reach out to them. Hold their hands. Love their hearts.

 

Follow Laura Bowley at Mindset here.

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4 Comments

  1. I agree with you – I have not relatives living here any more – they have flown and we rarely hear from them, particularly John and his 3 boys, so sad. He was a well respected journalist here for many years and had lots of friends and work colleagues. Their attitude is: I want to remember him as he was….

    as the caregiver I try also to make up to him for their lack of understanding.

    It was just the same with my mother.

    The isolation is very difficult, this is where online communities can be so beneficial

    • Yes, you’re right, online communities of people who are face-to-face with the disease and loved ones who live with it every day are really the only ones who get it.

      “I want to remember him or her as he or she was” does a disservice to the person who has dementia because they need people more than ever.

      Thanks for everything you do Di, and thanks for your great blog http://thejourneytoanotherworld.blogspot.com/

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